It has taken me a while to write about this Covid-19 crisis. It’s very hard to know what to say, but I’ve realized that, at this point, nothing that isn’t helpful or positive is going to be useful. If you’ve had to change all of your wedding plans out of nowhere, this post is for you!
Here are my tips on how to deal with having to postpone your wedding:
#1 Embrace The Change
I know this is much easier said than done. Have you heard the phrase “plan for the unexpected”? That means having a mindset of always knowing that things might not go as planned. I think it’s safe to say that NOBODY in this world could have expected a pandemic to happen at the beginning of 2020 and change everyone’s plans, so you have the complete and total right to be sad, disappointed, angry, even. But once all of those feelings go away, because they will, embrace the change. One way of doing that is sending out “Change The Dates” to your guests with some humor in it. I’ve seen so many amazing ones out there, but one of my favorites that I’ve seen just says “Let’s Try This Again” and it has the new date on it. That’s it. Simple, funny, and pretty cute. Your guests will love it!
#2 Do Something Special On Your Original Date
Some couples are deciding to still get married on their original date and having a big reception later. I’ve seen small backyard ceremonies, or somewhere outdoors, and I think it’s an amazing idea! If the date has meaning to you, it’s important that you make it special. You’ll remember that date, either way, so you might as well remember as one of the most special days in your life!
Even if you decided to postpone everything, ceremony, and reception, you can still make that day special! Go for a hike that you love, read your own vows at the viewpoint, have a picnic at on your favorite spot in town, dip your feet into the ocean, the list goes on. No matter what you do, make it special for you two. You can also just spend all day in your pajamas cuddling and drinking champagne, that’s always an option too! 😉
#3 Make a List Of The Positive Aspects
We just had a destination wedding postponed a whole year. We spent a while on facetime with our couple, and once we said “well, that will give people more time to save money for the flights, and maybe more of your guests will come”, then they started listing all of the people that were excited about the change. Their wedding was in Canada, and 80% of their guests were coming from outside of the country. Some of their close friends had already RSVP that they couldn’t come, either because they couldn’t afford to, or because they were having a baby at this time! Postponing their wedding a whole year gave those close friends of theirs a chance to come to their wedding, which they were super excited about.
So my tip is, make a list of all the positive things that you can think of that’s coming out of this! Guests that will be able to attend, maybe the fact that you’ll have more time to plan the decoration of your venue, not rushing while choosing your dress, etc. You’ll be surprised about how many positive things you can write it down!
#4 Know That Your New Date WILL Be Special
You might be thinking, “well, if I get married now and have a wedding reception later, maybe it won’t feel as special”. That’s not true. And I know that because I was kind of in your shoes in 2018. I’m from Brazil and Stephan is from California. From the moment we started talking about getting married, we knew we had to have 2 weddings, simply because I knew there would be people that wouldn’t be able to come to California, like my grandparents. But our “official wedding” had to be in California, because of the whole green card process.
While we were planning everything, I had the same thought. I started thinking the Brazilian wedding wouldn’t be special because it wasn’t official. That could not be further from the truth. I cried as if we were getting married for the first time. Our second non-official wedding was filled with as much joy as the first one.
So believe me, your new date, second wedding, a big party, however you want to call it, will be special. Your guests will be so ready to celebrate, they’ll be ready to be together, they’ll be happy for you two, and you’ll feel all of those “just married feelings” again, trust me.
#5 Talk About It
This is very important. If you’re feeling sad, frustrated, angry with the whole situation, don’t keep it to yourself. Talk with someone. Talk to your partner, your parents, your best friend, get it out of your system. Search for other brides that have had the same problem, ask for their advice. Read about other people’s stories and how they’ve had to deal with changing their plans, it’s a great way to know that you’re not going through this alone.
We have been constantly helping couples with their postponements, and we have to say, it’s amazing how everyone has been dealing with this. Getting to help them plan what to do on their original date has been especially awesome, because the bottom line is, the intention is still the same, and it won’t ever change. To marry your best friend, the love of your life. To celebrate love. If you need help figuring out the next steps, please don’t hesitate and contact us, we would love that!